Even Though...

I've lived in OC/LA almost all of my life -

I have no idea where I live.

I don't know cities.

I don't know freeways, I don't know how to get anywhere.

I once tried to go to a AAA (not AA), and wound up at Disneyland.

I always ask about city names and where it is, even though I've been everywhere.

I don't pay attention. Maybe I should. I spent a couple of summers going to the beach all of the time and would now need a Thomas Guide to get there. I get nervous and start to sweat if I end up driving more than twenty minutes.

I have never driven to LA by myself, even though I've driven to San diego, Joshua Tree, San Jose and Las Vegas.

I don't know anything.

Everybody can do things that I can't.

Yet, I've travelled at least through half of the US by myself.

Dichotomous dickhead w/no, or a great sense of non-direction?

Lazy? Yes.

Funny? Yes.

Hopeful? Yes.

Helpless? ALWAYS.