I am Jane Goodall's Tanzanian monkeys typing about bananas. My fingers are Santa's little helpers. My hope is a sporadic rainfall - yet a torrential downpour in all creative environments. I am Theseus, unspooling golden yarn. Sisyphus, sweating uphill. Bukowski, scribbling away in rooming houses. A river always flowing. I am the nightmare of stagnancy and a God of Imagination.
Wednesday, May 10, 2017
Saturday, April 08, 2017
My 30-Year Old Self Interviewed My 40-Year Old Self...DRAFT
My 30-Year Old Self Interviewied My 40-Year Old Self...DRAFT
Describe the 40 year old's house from the 30 years old's perspective. Like he's a legit interviewer. Describe the set up for the interview. And the room and the house that the interview is taking place in. Describe some of the 40 year old's mannerisms, etc.
30 - Before we start - I've got to say...I'm a HUGE fan.
40 - What? Seriously? That's kind of dumb. You...WE used to interview bands a little bit back in the day. That's what you say as an introduction? I - WE hate that shit! What's wrong with you? You okay, dude? And I'm looking at you too, dude You look fucking skinny, man. You look like I would if I did drugs. But you don't, I know. You need health insurance too and dental insurance. Seriously. Get that shit.
30 - You look...well. Ummm. Wait. What? Seriously. I mean - I am. I'm doing it, you know - I've just gotta -
40 - Nah. No, you're not.
30 - So. Uhmmm. So......you're not married, huh? And no kids? Dude. what happened?
40 - Nothing.
30 - I know, but - you know, I just kinda thought by now that -
40 - Nope. You and D broke up when you were 32. Sorry, buddy. Then came C and then came M and then came L and then came R and then came another M. Some were tiny dating relationships and don't really count. You have this to look forward to in the next ten years, dude. But it's good. It wasn't bad. Obviously there were some pretty heart-heavy and emotionally, fucking, heavy months and years but - it's okay. You will learn a shitload of stuff, my friend.
30 - Holy crap.
40 - Yeah...
30 - But what happened?
40 - Nothing, really. It's just people, man. Like I said - you'll learn a lot.
30 - Who was your - our favorite? Like, who did you -
40 - Dude. Seriously. Ask me something else.
30 - Okay. Sure. Ummm...Soooooo....I don't know what to say now.
40 - DUMB.
30 - Dude, that's not cool.
40 - Sorry. I'm not trying to be a dick. I love you. DUH. I really do. I'm just super tired and I get bored easily. ADHD, madness, compassion and I'm trying to bail out water in this tiny, yet tough boat that I'm in. I've got enough shit on my plate, man. Like, I'm sitting here -SUPER FUCKING TIRED. Like, I feel like I'm dying. Like I'm fucking dead. I'm dead when I'm awake. I'm a kid. I'm a zombie. I'm stupid. I'm wicked smaht, though. WICKED SMAHT.
30 - That sounds dumb.
40 - Yeah, dude. I'm sorry. Seriously. You've got a lot ahead of you.
30 - No. That sounds dumb what you said.
40 - What?
30 - I don't think that you've grown up that much, man - this is just what I'm saying. you like to talk. WE -I like to talk, yeah - for sure, but - DUDE. You sound just like me right now but just filled with more bullshit. you're not giving me that much hope. I mean, you're totally -
40 - Seriously? Awww...fuck yourself then. Go write some poetry, go...GO FUC
30 - Before we start - I've got to say...I'm a HUGE fan.
40 - What? Seriously? That's kind of dumb. You...WE used to interview bands a little bit back in the day. That's what you say as an introduction? I - WE hate that shit! What's wrong with you? You okay, dude? And I'm looking at you too, dude You look fucking skinny, man. You look like I would if I did drugs. But you don't, I know. You need health insurance too and dental insurance. Seriously. Get that shit.
30 - You look...well. Ummm. Wait. What? Seriously. I mean - I am. I'm doing it, you know - I've just gotta -
40 - Nah. No, you're not.
30 - So. Uhmmm. So......you're not married, huh? And no kids? Dude. what happened?
40 - Nothing.
30 - I know, but - you know, I just kinda thought by now that -
40 - Nope. You and D broke up when you were 32. Sorry, buddy. Then came C and then came M and then came L and then came R and then came another M. Some were tiny dating relationships and don't really count. You have this to look forward to in the next ten years, dude. But it's good. It wasn't bad. Obviously there were some pretty heart-heavy and emotionally, fucking, heavy months and years but - it's okay. You will learn a shitload of stuff, my friend.
30 - Holy crap.
40 - Yeah...
30 - But what happened?
40 - Nothing, really. It's just people, man. Like I said - you'll learn a lot.
30 - Who was your - our favorite? Like, who did you -
40 - Dude. Seriously. Ask me something else.
30 - Okay. Sure. Ummm...Soooooo....I don't know what to say now.
40 - DUMB.
30 - Dude, that's not cool.
40 - Sorry. I'm not trying to be a dick. I love you. DUH. I really do. I'm just super tired and I get bored easily. ADHD, madness, compassion and I'm trying to bail out water in this tiny, yet tough boat that I'm in. I've got enough shit on my plate, man. Like, I'm sitting here -SUPER FUCKING TIRED. Like, I feel like I'm dying. Like I'm fucking dead. I'm dead when I'm awake. I'm a kid. I'm a zombie. I'm stupid. I'm wicked smaht, though. WICKED SMAHT.
30 - That sounds dumb.
40 - Yeah, dude. I'm sorry. Seriously. You've got a lot ahead of you.
30 - No. That sounds dumb what you said.
40 - What?
30 - I don't think that you've grown up that much, man - this is just what I'm saying. you like to talk. WE -I like to talk, yeah - for sure, but - DUDE. You sound just like me right now but just filled with more bullshit. you're not giving me that much hope. I mean, you're totally -
40 - Seriously? Awww...fuck yourself then. Go write some poetry, go...GO FUC
41 - HELLOOOOOO??????
30 - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......
41 - HEY!
30 - ( Slepp murmuring) I THOUGHT THEY SMELLED BAD..On..THE INSIDES...
41 - WAKE UP!!!
30 - DUDE. This is bumming me out.
41 - I fucking hate you. I hate this...wait...how can I hate THIS? Like...THIS? DUDE. I don't really hate YOU.
30 - Yeah. You hate you. Stupid hater-guy-future-jerk.
41 - ............
30 - Every time that you write a period in an elipsis an angel gets cancer in their hollow, brittle bird bones.
41 - ......
41 - ......
30 - Keep on killing angels, Freakazoid.
41 - ........I......HATE......YOU...........................
30 - DUDE. This is bumming me out.
41 - I fucking hate you. I hate this...wait...how can I hate THIS? Like...THIS? DUDE. I don't really hate YOU.
30 - Yeah. You hate you. Stupid hater-guy-future-jerk.
41 - ............
30 - Every time that you write a period in an elipsis an angel gets cancer in their hollow, brittle bird bones.
41 - ......
41 - ......
30 - Keep on killing angels, Freakazoid.
41 - ........I......HATE......YOU...........................
Thank you, Dear Reader...
Somehow I stumbled across your blog years ago. I don't know why or how but I know when and it's the when that matters. I was going through some things. I lost someone close to me. I needed an escape. I didn't know what to do or how to cope. That's where you come in. You see, your blog inspired me to write. I have read every entry and whether it was a quote or lyrics or something personally philosophical it spoke to me when I needed it.
Sunday, March 05, 2017
Tuesday, February 28, 2017
Describe the 40 year old's house from the 30 years old's perspective. Like he's a legit interviewer. Describe the set up for the interview. And the room and the house that the interview is taking place in. Describe some of the 40 year old's mannerisms, etc.
30 - Before we start - I've got to say...I'm a HUGE fan.
40 - What? Seriously? That's kind of dumb. You...WE used to interview bands a little bit back in the day. That's what you say as an introduction? I - WE hate that shit! What's wrong with you? You okay, dude? And I'm looking at you too, dude You look fucking skinny, man. You look like I would if I did drugs. But you don't, I know. You need health insurance too and dental insurance. Seriously. Get that shit.
30 - You look...well. Ummm. Wait. What? Seriously. I mean - I am. I'm doing it, you know - I've just gotta -
40 - Nah. No, you're not.
30 - So. Uhmmm. So......you're not married, huh? And no kids? Dude. what happened?
40 - Nothing.
30 - I know, but - you know, I just kinda thought by now that -
40 - Nope. You and D broke up when you were 32. Sorry, buddy. Then came C and then came M and then came L and then came R and then came another M. Some were tiny dating relationships and don't really count. You have this to look forward to in the next ten years, dude. But it's good. It wasn't bad. Obviously there were some pretty heart-heavy and emotionally, fucking, heavy months and years but - it's okay. You will learn a shitload of stuff, my friend.
30 - Holy crap.
40 - Yeah...
30 - But what happened?
40 - Nothing, really. It's just people, man. Like I said - you'll learn a lot.
30 - Who was your - our favorite? Like, who did you -
40 - Dude. Seriously. Ask me something else.
30 - Okay. Sure. Ummm...Soooooo....I don't know what to say now.
40 - DUMB.
30 - Dude, that's not cool.
40 - Sorry. I'm not trying to be a dick. I love you. DUH. I really do. I'm just super tired and I get bored easily. ADHD, madness, compassion and I'm trying to bail out water in this tiny, yet tough boat that I'm in. I've got enough shit on my plate, man. Like, I'm sitting here -SUPER FUCKING TIRED. Like, I feel like I'm dying. Like I'm fucking dead. I'm dead when I'm awake. I'm a kid. I'm a zombie. I'm stupid. I'm wicked smaht, though. WICKED SMAHT.
30 - That sounds dumb.
40 - Yeah, dude. I'm sorry. Seriously. You've got a lot ahead of you.
30 - No. That sounds dumb what you said.
40 - What?
30 - I don't think that you've grown up that much, man - this is just what I'm saying. you like to talk. WE -I like to talk, yeah - for sure, but - DUDE. You sound just like me right now but just filled with more bullshit. you're not giving me that much hope. I mean, you're totally -
40 - Seriously? Awww...fuck yourself then. Go write some poetry, go...GO FUC
30 - Before we start - I've got to say...I'm a HUGE fan.
40 - What? Seriously? That's kind of dumb. You...WE used to interview bands a little bit back in the day. That's what you say as an introduction? I - WE hate that shit! What's wrong with you? You okay, dude? And I'm looking at you too, dude You look fucking skinny, man. You look like I would if I did drugs. But you don't, I know. You need health insurance too and dental insurance. Seriously. Get that shit.
30 - You look...well. Ummm. Wait. What? Seriously. I mean - I am. I'm doing it, you know - I've just gotta -
40 - Nah. No, you're not.
30 - So. Uhmmm. So......you're not married, huh? And no kids? Dude. what happened?
40 - Nothing.
30 - I know, but - you know, I just kinda thought by now that -
40 - Nope. You and D broke up when you were 32. Sorry, buddy. Then came C and then came M and then came L and then came R and then came another M. Some were tiny dating relationships and don't really count. You have this to look forward to in the next ten years, dude. But it's good. It wasn't bad. Obviously there were some pretty heart-heavy and emotionally, fucking, heavy months and years but - it's okay. You will learn a shitload of stuff, my friend.
30 - Holy crap.
40 - Yeah...
30 - But what happened?
40 - Nothing, really. It's just people, man. Like I said - you'll learn a lot.
30 - Who was your - our favorite? Like, who did you -
40 - Dude. Seriously. Ask me something else.
30 - Okay. Sure. Ummm...Soooooo....I don't know what to say now.
40 - DUMB.
30 - Dude, that's not cool.
40 - Sorry. I'm not trying to be a dick. I love you. DUH. I really do. I'm just super tired and I get bored easily. ADHD, madness, compassion and I'm trying to bail out water in this tiny, yet tough boat that I'm in. I've got enough shit on my plate, man. Like, I'm sitting here -SUPER FUCKING TIRED. Like, I feel like I'm dying. Like I'm fucking dead. I'm dead when I'm awake. I'm a kid. I'm a zombie. I'm stupid. I'm wicked smaht, though. WICKED SMAHT.
30 - That sounds dumb.
40 - Yeah, dude. I'm sorry. Seriously. You've got a lot ahead of you.
30 - No. That sounds dumb what you said.
40 - What?
30 - I don't think that you've grown up that much, man - this is just what I'm saying. you like to talk. WE -I like to talk, yeah - for sure, but - DUDE. You sound just like me right now but just filled with more bullshit. you're not giving me that much hope. I mean, you're totally -
40 - Seriously? Awww...fuck yourself then. Go write some poetry, go...GO FUC
A VERY SERIOUS RUMBLING. ROLLING THUNDER. LED ZEPPELIN LIGHTNING. A SEAM IN THE FABRIC OF OUR REALITY SPLITS SUDDENLY. WE SEE A BLOODSHOT SHARK-LIKE EYE OF AN OLD GOD. TESSERACTS, RIFTS, BLEEDS, SHIMMYS, HADRON DEMONS POUR THRPOUGH DIMENSIONAL TEARS LIKE THE TEARS OF
They wake up. Sudnly . lik a bed dreem from
DUDE!
I haven't seen you in a while! How are you? Are you well?
Dude, like - seriously! How are you?
Dude, like - seriously! How are you?
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