7 a.m. fucking cute ass dog licking his goddamn feet all of the fucking goddamn time.
7:17 a.m. fucking cute ass cat biting my nose, trying to be affectionate. Killing me like humans do bunnies in chocolate form.
8:01 Caffeinated girlfriend almost gets killed as she walks into the bedroom to talk about the days forthcoming events. Kevynn abruptly/sleep-deprived/nightmare-plagued, lunges at her. She screams and gives him the “maybe we should increase the sedation dosage of our prized research primate” look.
8:05 first of many bass-thumping cars rattles the windows.
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