Suggested By Isaac Asimov... 
  


Should not be going out to see a couple bands and to sing Karoake.
Should be asleep fighting off this small flu-like-thingy.
Should be smarter.
Should save more money.
Should not of played with all of those little kids at my girlfriend's nieces birthday party
because now I have red hand prints, dirt and food all over the shirt that I was going to wear tonight.
Should blow my nose.
Should not be meeting The Hard Artist and Cartoon Pig. 
Should not feed Gremlins after midnight.
Should see a man about a horse.
Should see your mom.
Should stop now.


 




 

Obi-Wan... 
 

 
more smoke and then I think I'm done for.
 
Too much booze.
 
Listen to this  http://www.audioblogger.com/media/27352/75545.mp3 
 
And then feel happy that you weren't us last night.
 
Even though being totally drunk and hearing Henry Rollins DJing isn't too shabby.
 
goo seep.
 
eric magnus
victor von doom
john lyndon
scott summers
richard leakey
john edwards
emma frost
zeus 


 

Bannock Beans And Black Tea... 
 

   
Looked like earthquake weather outside today. Overcast pink sky, slightly humid and quiet. No earthquake though. I've been through my fair share, and as the years have gone by - I've slept through more and more of them. I figure that if the shit's really going to go down - then no amount of standing under doorways is going to help me.
 
I was on acid and asleep in a car when a huge earthquake hit once. I thought that it was my friends in the park playing tricks on me and pushing the car back and forth. It freaked me out, but, then again, I was on acid and pretty much anything can freak you out.
 
I'm not prepared if a big earthquake hits. I don't think many people are. I do live close to a grocery store and a park. I guess that's good. I have a first aid kit and some water in my car. I also have two crash helmets. Those wont help me. I have a couple hundred old cassette tapes. Those wont help. I have a Daredevil action figure that is waiting to be shipped to the nerd who bought it off me from Ebay. He better hurry his ass up or I'm going to re-list it. Nerd. Hurry. I need the fifty bucks.
 
Now I've jinxed myself and will fish the crash helmets out of my car for me and my girlfriend to wear for the rest of the day. Then I will drink all of the beer in the fridge so that they don't go to waste when the big one comes. 


 

 

Bremen...



Ran into the bedroom to give the girlfriend a kiss. Legs got snagged by two laundry baskets. Fell flat on my face. Now she's done laughing. And I'm done giving her kisses.

Then she asked me if I'd make her something that wasn't fattening. I sliced up some organic cucumbers with a little dish of low sodium soy sauce. She ate half and then gave me the plate. She said she wasn't hungry anymore. Minutes later I heard a plastic-ky-type rustling coming from the bedroom. I ran in and almost tripped over the laundry baskets again. She was eating Cheez-Its.

After this post, I am killing her in her sleep.

Thank you.

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And the bombs dropped years ago
But our clean up crews are doing their work in the fields
They have the most sophisticated equipment at their disposal

Two plus two equals stop counting
Attila The Hun was yesterday
Today was a verbose, genial Hitler
All of you are The Third Reich
Almost at three strikes
Don’t waste your jugen

Met a man with colon cancer at a bar
And I didn’t talk to him on purpose
A kid jumped on my lap and told me that he loved me
I saw a bird die of West Nile
And a lady in her forties poured her heart out to me about her husband

A guy from Chicago paid for a drink of a friend of mine with ring-studded fists full of money-clipped cash
Fish fell from the sky
I smoked on a bench and watched five crickets jerk spasmodically across the sidewalk
I met a girl with pink hair
I petted a black Labrador with wet fur
I drank seven beers
I ate a New York Steak
I wished
I fished
I digress
Half of this stuff is made up
and that was today
but it's okay

because it was all part of my happy meal

Cortez And The Fountain Of Youth...

If you ever want to see what I was like when I was young -
wake me up on my only day off and then have me do errands with you -
because I start crying like a fucking baby.

Blackstar...



After I climbed on the roof and tried to grab the cat that was sitting on top of my chimney, I went and joined two female friends and one girlfriend at a restaurant. Of course they were haunted parasitically by boys. Of course the cockroaches scurried when the Kev light came on. Of course we got the hell out of there after that. They all told me creepy stories about guys hitting on them. This is after about...three hours. Why do girls tell you stories about how uncomfortable they were? When you ask them why-didn't-they-just-say-this? and why-didn't-you-just-do-this? they giggle and say that they didn't want to be mean. Hmmm...makes no sense. I could go on a tangent here, but I won't. I don't like to generalize and I don't like to write too much about even-stupider-stuff than the usual drivel that I vomit out, but...doi, duh, blah, foo, poo...c'mon. Enough said.

Mum-Ra...

Pray...

That my pizza doesn't burn.
Yes.

It is THAT important.

Meet George Jetson...

Having sex in Zero Gravity would be cool, but dodging all of the floating liquids would suck.