Fat Free Milk

Carl Sagan Poos On Your Cheap Ice Chest Flying Thing... I will personally fly alongside the space shuttle when it comes back to ensure its s...

The Only Thing... Funny about my insomnia is... nothing. BUT I AM doing something even if it's REALLY nothing while you're doing no...

Too stupid to be smarter. Too smart to be stupid. Too much. Too little. Too lazy. Brain on fire. One of these days - hopefully a great many ...

Dude. The other day I bought a bag of potatoes and it's totally smelling up the house. And now I don't know where to put the bag of ...

Whatever Song This Is, Playing - I Don't Like It... But I'm too busy typing crap that you and I won't remember tomorrow. By this...

"Groovy!"... Everybody should write at least ONE horror film.

F U In The A, Kid... That's what I should've said after my bartending shift when I was at the 24 grocery store inquiring to the pimp...

Why... Do old men smell like eggs? When I'm old, I want to smell like pipe smoke and the cheap perfume of hookers...or maybe like the pe...

Dogs Of War... I'm glad that I wear socks and shoes because if I didn't... The I'd never appreciate how good it feels to take th...

I Came Up With The Title Of Fat Free Milk Because I looked In The Fridge... And now, folks...it's been awhile, but I just may - start to...