Saturday, April 11, 2015


I've lost it
not my sanity
but
something else
something even bigger than losing your marbles
I've lost will, direction/hope
I don't know if I can get it back
its not about me getting older
it's about what I still feel but can't reach anymore
its about staying in my room for the whole day and night
it's about the oppressive weight of depression
I'll call it it DOPEression
and the fire-ant pains in my phantom brain(s)
I was better once
I thought that I was bad then
now I'm really bad

and I guess that's the lesson of the day

it can always get worse
lows become lower

I know that things have just as much capacity to go the other way too
but
I've lost that positivity also

you were my moon, Miss
and
I miss me
I miss you, Son

All of this and everything

I've lost it

not my sanity
but
something else
something
and everything

Everything and Nothing


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